dog eat god

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6/18/03---8:51 AM

Life is so much better these days.

Today I visit with Giuseppe. It has been six months since my last confession, here are my sins.

What is weird is they still have to give me a PAP. They check for cancerous cells at the edge of the vaginal cuff. Don't think too hard about it, the visual is unappealing. Sometimes it amazes me that I have a hole that just ends. That they could snip off the whole uterus. I don't know why anybody would want to fuck me.

I used to prepare my questions days in advance. I am supposed to get checked out every three months. Giuseppe said six, but since I am nervous he said he would see me in three. He tells me not to worry, I am cured. How can you not worry. That a cell is drifting through my body looking for an organ to invade.

He gave me a polaroid of my uterus laying on a green napkin, right after it was removed from my body. It is not an elegant little organ. It was big and red like a fist, had little Thalomide wings and looked like the chicken in Eraserhead.

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